God I love Busprione. One pill and my worries seem less intense and there's no high. Ahhh. The danger lies in apathy.

Test

Ha ha they weren't mad @ me it was all in my head . . . again?

Wow I don't want to be here.And it's too late to back out.

So I can't say this on Facebook so I'll say it here: HAPPY 4:20 EVERYONE!!!!!!!!

I'm finally at the point where I can talk to a girl and not think Happily Ever After. Yay :-)

So 6 weeks on Busprione taking only slightly more than directed and 2 weeks on Zoloft and all is good. Not stressing the small stuff is a HUGE relief.

Just saw From Hell. Hafta say it wasn't that good :/

Blah 5 hours left in my fast . . . the a buffet!

Is my Happily Ever After really out there? Or should I just give up and resign myself to divine obscurity?

Still I am hopelessly in love w/ A. She becons, I call. One night and I would show her what could have been. Still, friends forever.

"The Invention of Lying" once again proves that I can cry about movies because I can't cry about my own life.

Question for tomorrow: Why do I fear rejection and failure and is it excessive?

Is the fear of rejection or failure the reason I'm still single?

Was the fear of rejection or failure the real reason I didn't go to college? Not laziness or lack of encouragement?

Somehow having a family day is kinda depressing :-(

I should be able to satisft those needs myself, but I can't. I still desperatly crave recognition.

I still depend on others to satisfy my insecurites. I need praise and recognition from others because it's never enough to do something just for me.

Life is nothing more than satisfying needs and desires and avoiding fears and insecurities. I had potential, but I never grew up and now I don't know how to.

Faith conflicts with my view on reality. I feel that if I have it will be giving into my fear of death.

Just saw a rainbow over a church with a cross at the apex. Was it a sign? I don't think so, but it was pretty.

I'm not broke w/ no imediate prospect of being broke. I've made a decision not to do "that what must not be named". What's next, weight gain?

What's up with this? I'm have such low confidence today and I'm irratable. Why can't I find my zen and keep it?