All your life you're told to be yourself but what happens when you realize nobody likes the real you? Then you realize that in your quest for the real you, you've lost the will to be anything else. I guess that's the point that you come to the inevitable conclusion that you will be alone for the rest of your miserable existence. That your social ineptness is simply not something that can be compensated for.
You know that even in the depths of your whining monologue that somebody will come along again. And you know that when somebody new comes along you will again find some way to sabotage it.
1 comment:
What a delectably black and white view of things. If the world was that simple, you would be right.
The thing is, the world in general is completely fucked up, BUT there ARE people in the world who will like you for who you are.
Study the social "rulebook" - it is your bible. No offence if you're christian- I haven't read the rest of your posts so I wouldn't know. Social intelligence is something the popular people (the ones you most hated in high school) seem to be born with. It doesn't necessarily mean you are nice, it may not be a good thing- it is your ability to "butter up" and get along with people. And in this world you need to do that. Show a select part of the real you to them. Amuse yourself by playing their way if you need to. The point is that you don't have to be the real thing to everybody. Pick and choose which parts you keep.
Virginia Satir's declaration of self-esteem says "If later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought And felt turn out to be unfitting, I can discard that which is
Unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that
Which I discarded"
And the real you is a fluid thing.
And most importantly, don't try to fit in with people who you have nothing in common with. This is a total jumble now, sorry.
Oh well. xx have a good day today
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