So I know this blog will be really famous after I die. It's the middle of the night and I wasn't thinking about suicide, but Post Secret put in on my mind. And I admit, I'm morbid, I've read some suicide notes online and they're so uninspired. When I write mine, it's going to be the best piece of writing that I'll ever do. It will make me famous and it won't matter because I'm dead, but isn't that the entire point of writing here, so there's some record of me after I die. Isn't that the reason that slowly over the past 6 years or so I've been able to . . . never mind.

I can't go on that subject between the hours of 3 and 4 AM, especially a Saturday night. Since I don't exactly have religion, I have spirituality and superstition. And I don't know what it is about being at my grandparents place, but it seems like the veil between the land of the living and the land of the dead is thinner here than it is elsewhere. I mean, it's down right creepy. There are always things out of the corner of my here that I don't get at home, and weird noises, nothing overt, but god that mirror across from my bed here. . . scary. So I don't think I'll be talking about death quite yet.

So what do I want to write about then? I don't know, I just want to write. I want to create something. But not right now, because it really is 3:40 in the morning and nothing I write will be all that comprehensible.

At this moment I do not hate, I do not fear, I am alive.