I come home after a hard day at work and I take it out on the easiest target.  In this case, Him.  I don't like him, he's a horrible, manipulative person that doesn't deserve what limited happiness he has.  He's turned my little sisters against me, and I've already mentioned that he ended up in jail for hitting my mother (which they both still deny, those lying pieces of shit) and he tried to kiss my then 19 year old cousin when she was most vulnerable, again he denies this.  I hate that son of a bitch and I've always hated him.  So after a long day at work when he's being the piece of shit, passive aggressive asshole that he normally is, I almost, finally go off on him.  I bruised his rib once when I was a teenager, now 150 lbs heavier, I'm afraid that I would hurt him a lot worse and end up in jail.  I don't know why everybody doesn't see him as the horrible person he is.  It's entirely possible that this may all be in my head.  My experiences with That-Which-Must-Not-Be-Named has left me questioning my perception of reality.  Who do you think the oft mention Manny is?  Manny is simply: The External Manifestation of Internal Strife.  The point being, I don't know he's actually a piece of shit, or if it's all in my head.  I can never trust my own perception when Manny is still a part of my life.  I've read that extended and excessive use of That-Which-Must-Not-Be-Named will cause Manny to pop his ugly head up for up to a year after once ceases.  So I'm at 2 weeks now, only 50 to go.  But because He is storming around like the asshole that he is, I must stop this mid rant without ever getting to my reason for starting this post.

The point was: I'm afraid that if I come home from a long day at work and take out my frustrations with life on the easiest target, doesn't that make me potentially emotionally abusive to my future wife and children?  Of course, that's exactly what Asshole does, so maybe it's simply a product of being related to Him.

Or maybe he's actually an asshole and the maybe being out in public and realizing that I am not in fact a piece of shit, of having momentary glimpses of how the world actually sees me, I realize that I'm not the problem.