Okay, so not really . . .

So I thought this blog was dead, but I think I've changed my mind.  This blog has been too much a part of my life for too long to give up on it just like that.  Unlike most of my friends who seem to have abandoned me, I do not abandon things that are important to me.  Right now I'm feeling really lonely, probably the result of having spent the entire day in my room, save a couple of hours this morning where I watched the dog.  I just couldn't think of a good reason to come down stairs today.  I came down for lunch, and I came down to smoke a cigarette just to get out of the confines of my room.  Okay, so maybe I should have gone for that walk that I've been talking about for days, maybe I could have gone apply for some jobs, but some days you just don't feel like doing anything and today was one of those days.  I wish someone would reach out to me and say Hi, I'm happy that you exist.  For now, I just feel like a burden on everyone.  Like coming down stairs to be part of the family would somehow infringe upon their time as a family.  That's why tomorrow, I'll spend the day in my room again, doing nothing except for playing video games and praying to a god that I'm not sure exists to please, oh please end my loneliness.  Okay, tomorrow will be a better day.  It has to be, right?