For a long, long time I told myself that I like to be lonely. That my life is supposed to be filled with endless despair and rejection. And then something happened, where I was happy in life for no good reason. Well maybe I have a reason, but it's not a good one. So I realize that they can put me on whatever que they want me to, whenever they have any reason to, but who cares, by putting me back on regular que from question/escalation for a week, they damage my fragile happiness. Contentment is fine, happiness is great, but it's all so fragile. How can I say that happiness isn't good for me, and that I fear it, when this week has been amazingly great. This writing is real crap. Definitely not the high quality writing that I'm used to producing. But I don't feel really passionate right now, I just feel depressed. Well, what am I going to do about it? Nothing. I don't want to be here, and I want to go home and pretend I'm not real.