Wow today was interesting, last night I Meant to be responsible. I Meant to be a good boy and eat and have a goodnight sleep before I went off to my first day at work. All I wanted was some "maintenance", just do a couple things to make the world a little better and then go off to nighty night land. . . and then it didn't happen. After fixing one issue, I went onto another and another and before I knew I had to take all of the credit fixing things instead of spreading the glory around to my very capable and gerous friends. So after getting way greedy with the "credit" and loosing some parters in the shop, I end up staying up until three in the morning obsessing over the fact that I have to work tomorrow and all I can think about is how much time I spent trying to work on an issue . . . the point is, I ended up staying up all night obsessing over things that while relivent, did not make me a better new worker boy. . .

So I flipped. I tried and I tried to sleep and concentrate on the task at hand and getting some sleep, the harder I tried, the less effective I became. So there I am, it's six thirty in the morning, the sun is up and I'm in the shower still trying to stop obessing over the irrelivent, so I try some more and an hour before I have to go to work I'm at my nieghbor's house asking if my mind is so far on mechanics that everyone at the new job will notice that my mind just isn't it. If they know that my mind isn't it, then why bother to show up in the first place. . . I mean, rather be fired for not showing up than to be fired for being too preoccupied.

So I go. I fought and then I went. I'm there. First, I'm in a new environment, a place that I've never been before with thousands and thousands of strangers crowding all around me and I'm late! I don't want to late for my first day. If I'm late, why bother showing up . . . see, it was an out. But I did show up. And I'm set in a non-speicific place, doing a non-specific task, with not enough information. Litterally, I was placed on a line and told to keep people from cutting through the flag. I wasn't told what to say or exactly what to do, or where to stand or how to stand. And I was stuck in a the middle of 40,000 people people as they ALL filed past me. Wow, I felt like a tweeked out retard splayed out for all the world to gape at and comment on. . . and then after the worst of it, and a break and a big bottle of much needed water, I slowly start to realize that this is not much different from the rest of my jobs.

It's all trouble shooting (like when I stood infront of a broken bottle telling people to watch out for the glass) or customer service, like when I was asked by the VIP lady where the shuttle was and I bullshitted and answer, and then there was passing the buck. When I didn't know, I pointed them in a vague direction for someone that did have the answer. Just like call center work (and some variation of that will be my facebook status). So I got a compliment from my supervisor, and I figured out a job while facing my fears and I stood in the hot sun for five, long brutal hours. So in short, I feel accomplished. Still I feel bad for being greedy before, but that still be old Manni popping up his head, though I kinda don't think so. And now I'm tired and it's time to sleep.