To everybody and nobody, but mostly to myself:

I am so acutely depressed today. It's not something like: oh I hate my life I want to end it etc. It's more like: why am I here? Is there a reason I'm alone? Will I always be alone? I know there's a noble phrase for what I'm feeling. Divine obscurity.

There's a good phrase, somehow the word divine makes even the most bland of phrases seem Nobel. Divine nobility, there's a good phrase. Wouldn't that be the pope and his minions? Divine minions, that's not a good phrase, that would be like Holy Hellraisers (that's a pretty phrase)

So back to my original phrase: divine obscurity. Some days I wish I was messed up, because the mentally ill never feel this guilt or their mortality as hard as I do. Alas, mortality beckons.